Before embarking upon my little account (my verbatIm account!) please allow me to make something absolutely clear. From past experience I do know there are some that might easily misunderstand. Sadly, some* even going out of their way to do so.

I love France, its people, its culture, the way of life and everything about living here. I have the greatest respect for France and its people. Anyone saying otherwise will be rayé de ma liste de cartes de Noël! Naturally though there are a few things I miss that I enjoyed in the country of my birth, but which are not so easy to find here. This does not mean that I am about to ‘give up the good life’ and return!
*No, not you madam. Kindly sit down!

Stamping out confusion!
(don't ya just love 'em)

Moi. ”Je voudrais acheter deux cents timbres-poste un euro s'il vous plaît.” (“I wish to buy 200 one Euro stamps please.”)

Counter clerk: ”Nous n'avons pas de timbres-poste d'une valeur de 200 euros!” (“We do not ‘ave any 200 Euro postage stamps.”)

Moi: “No, no. That’s not what I meant. I wish to buy a 1 Euro stamp, but two hundred of them.”

Counter clerk: "Pourquoi?" (“Why?”)

Moi: “Because I have two hundred letters to post.”

Counter clerk: “You 'ave two 'undred letters to post!?” (look of utter astonishment and disbelief.)

Moi: “Yes.”

Counter clerk: “How do you know what is the correct value of the stamp for which you must lick the behind of each one so as to affix it to your letters?”

Moi: “I weighed one of them and they are all identical.”

Counter clerk: “You cannot weigh them. It is forbidden. You do not ‘ave a calibrated and certified balance postal!”

Moi: “Yes I do.”

Counter clerk: “Where did you get it? It is illegal.”

Moi: “No it isn’t illegal. I bought it in England.”

Counter clerk: “It will not work. You cannot use a balance postal such as you ‘ave in your possession ‘ere in France!”

Moi: “Of course it’ll work and I can use it here and no, it isn’t illegal as you put it. A gram weighs the same in England as it does in France.”

Counter clerk “I’ll fetch the manager.”

Manager: "Bonjour. Comment est-ce que je peux vous aider?" (“Hello. How I can 'elp you?”)

Moi: ”Je voudrais acheter deux cents timbres-poste un euro s'il vous plaît.”
(“I wish to buy 200 one Euro stamps please.”)

Manager: ”Nous n'avons pas de timbres-poste d'une valeur de 200 euros !”
(“We do not ‘ave any 200 Euro postage stamps.”)