Telephones soon to be history Click to read why.

"Hello. I'm a telephone answering machine. What are you?"

"Hello. I'm probably in right now but I'm just avoiding talking to someone I don't like. Leave me a message and if I don't call back, it's you."

"Hello. Chris’s answering machine is broken. This is his refrigerator. Please speak very clearly and slowly, and I'll stick your message on my door with one of his magnets."

"How do you leave a message on this damned thing? I can't understand the soddin’ instructions. Hello. Testing. Testing.  1 2 3.   1 2 3.  I wonder what happens if I press this ...Oh shit!!"

"Hello. I'm sorry I can't answer the phone right now but I’ll only be a few minutes. Please leave a message, and then wait by your phone and I might call you back."

"Hello. If you’re a burglar casing the joint then I’m out back right now, cleaning my shotgun, so you’d best hang up. Otherwise please leave a message."

"Hello. Thank you for calling. I am sorry we weren’t able to answer your call personally but that’s your fault for calling when we're out."

Close and return to previous page